The Long Climb

I feel like I may somewhat be giving the wrong impression of myself in this blog.  I’m not generally a craven person and I’m by no means lazy.  I’ve just begun to recognize a downward slide in my habits during the past few years and it is my intent to rectify it now, before it’s too late.

As a kid, I was truly a bit of a lazy slob but as I moved closer and closer to adulthood, I made it a point to change my habits.  Perhaps that is why this has become so important to me now.  I remade myself once and I don’t want to have to do it again.  Yes, people change, but what’s the point if it’s not changing for the better?

All that being said, I stumbled a little yesterday.  Not that bad of a slip-up but still it’s troubling to have happened so early in my quest to change my habits.  The trick is to have more good days than bad days and so far, that’s been the case but yesterday wasn’t one of my good days.

It all started when my wife asked meet to meet her at the bowling alley where she was entertaining our daughter and one of her friends.  I was starving even though I’d just had a Clif Bar but figured I would drop by and give her some company.  There we had a beer together which is no big deal because we both have active social lives and often attend events where drinks are shared among friends so I figured that I would never be able to be a tee-totaler even if I wanted to.  One drink is fine during the occasional weekday but really, no more than one.

Afterwards, I came home, reheated diner, put a second coat of the waterproofing compount on the shower walls, and then ate with my girls.  They had to be up early the next day for a trip to Houston so we were all in bed by 9:00pm and they were fast asleep within seconds.  I, however, wasn’t so lucky.

The dog started whining, a jet flew past, I could hear cars on the road, and a song was stuck in my head.  My old insomnia was tugging at my brain and the part of me that had, had a beer early was telling me that I could have another drink and fall asleep easy.

I tried to fight it for a while but the dog kept whining and the noises kept happening and soon I was up, sitting on the couch, and drinking a shot of rum.  I had two in all and was asleep by 10:30.  The drinks accomplished their goal, and I didn’t imbibe to excess, but I wish I hadn’t at all.  I broke my promise to myself and went above my daily calorie limits. 

I have to keep trying to be better all the time and it’s a long climb up.